Friday, December 11, 2009

Bring It! December 11, 2009

Like the facets of a disco ball, a shiny new year offers a great way to reflect.

Like at an epic dance party, so much happens in a year that it’s hard to keep track while it’s happening. It’s only when you finally sit down and pop a bottle of champagne (woo hoo!) that you realize how much you’ve been through and how much better you are for it.

I’m reflecting on a huge year personally, and it ended with a bang at Black XXXmas, one of my favorite dance parties of the year. This time around, I got the living-the-dream pleasure of performing in between two of my favorite DJs, Luke Johnstone and Abel, and in between two of my dearest members of The Pussy Posse, Travis Creston and Joanna Parks.

A lot of people go to church on Christmas, and my going to the dancefloor instead isn’t that different. My fellow circuit queens feel me when I say that sometimes I’m convinced “god” is in what the DJ serves up, in that ecstatic moment when you hear a “hymn” that speaks to you and to exactly where you are in your life.

The “church music” the Pussy Posse performed to at Black XXXmas was a song called “Believe,” and it’s a perfect anthem for the true joy of being gay.

To be what ya wanna be
To go where ya need to go in life
To do the things you need to do for yourself
All ya gotta do is believe.

That’s as good as gospel for everything that makes San Francisco the best place on earth, a place where I feel proud to live, and blessed to bring it wherever and however the spirit moves me.

Do what ya wanna do
To do what ya need to do
To do all that will make you happy in your life
All ya gotta do is believe in yourself.

Where else can a girl be the gayest man she knows among all her beloved gays, perform at parties she lives to be at with all her beloved gays, and host fun parties that support the communities and causes of all her beloved gays?

I love my gays in so many ways I can’t even speak to them all here, and I want to know more about all the ways you love being gay, too. Please come to!

Bring It! December 11, 2009

Like the facets of a disco ball, a shiny new year offers a great way to reflect.

Like at an epic dance party, so much happens in a year that it’s hard to keep track while it’s happening. It’s only when you finally sit down and pop a bottle of champagne (woo hoo!) that you realize how much you’ve been through and how much better you are for it.

I’m reflecting on a huge year personally, and it ended with a bang at Black XXXmas, one of my favorite dance parties of the year. This time around, I got the living-the-dream pleasure of performing in between two of my favorite DJs, Luke Johnstone and Abel, and in between two of my dearest members of The Pussy Posse, Travis Creston and Joanna Parks.

A lot of people go to church on Christmas, and my going to the dancefloor instead isn’t that different. My fellow circuit queens feel me when I say that sometimes I’m convinced “god” is in what the DJ serves up, in that ecstatic moment when you hear a “hymn” that speaks to you and to exactly where you are in your life.

The “church music” the Pussy Posse performed to at Black XXXmas was a song called “Believe,” and it’s a perfect anthem for the true joy of being gay.

To be what ya wanna be
To go where ya need to go in life
To do the things you need to do for yourself
All ya gotta do is believe.

That’s as good as gospel for everything that makes San Francisco the best place on earth, a place where I feel proud to live, and blessed to bring it wherever and however the spirit moves me.

Do what ya wanna do
To do what ya need to do
To do all that will make you happy in your life
All ya gotta do is believe in yourself.

Where else can a girl be the gayest man she knows among all her beloved gays, perform at parties she lives to be at with all her beloved gays, and host fun parties that support the communities and causes of all her beloved gays?

I love my gays in so many ways I can’t even speak to them all here, and I want to know more about all the ways you love being gay, too. Please come to!

Friday, November 27, 2009

Bring It! November 27, 2009

Seeing San Francisco through the eyes of visitors is always an eye-opening experience. It’s great to be reminded of all the things we can take for granted here in Oz.

When a pair of dear friends arrived from Minneapolis to see “how real San Franciscans live” over the holidays, I was skeptical at first. Why not come for Pride or Folsom or something else uniquely San Franciscan in scale and scope?

But going out with them on what was supposedly “an off weekend” made me realize that there’s no such thing as an off weekend when you live over the rainbow. It’s a real gift. Even when half the city is out of town and the other half is staying home overeating and being underactive in a way that San Franciscans normally try to avoid, we still do things our own glittery way.

In the Midwest, the holidays probably aren’t celebrated with a leather-bar crawl or with big gay singalongs. Family feasts probably aren’t punctuated with nitrous charges and marijuana desserts. The seasonal soundtrack probably isn’t songs from the circuit or showtunes sung by drag queens.

Ritual and tradition are no less meaningful among San Framily than they are among our “real” families back at home. Getting to see that from the perspective of extended family visiting from the gay hinterlands makes me feel both blessed and blissed, the way holidays are supposed to make you feel but rarely actually do.

I was worried that my visitors wouldn’t see enough of “the real San Francisco,” but realness is exactly what’s worth celebrating in the city that sets the standard for how to do everything the gay way, and for how to add a little more gay to every day.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Bring It! November 13, 2009

Living in San Francisco gives me so many reasons to be thankful it’s ridiculous. It’s easily worth living beyond my means and living without sleep.

When counting my San Francisco blessings, freedom always comes to mind first, and then there’s our exceptional quality of life. We live large here in Oz, so large that it’s perfectly easy to forget there’s any other way to live.

Some San Franciscans aren’t so fortunate, and it’s important that we don’t forget them. Fortunately, our beautiful bubble by the bay offers countless ways to have big fun and give something big back to the community while doing it.

Enjoying a party and helping a cause aren’t mutually exclusive pursuits. Or they shouldn’t be, so I try to multitask in this way whenever possible. It’s really not hard, and there’s a bounty of rewards.

This Thanksgiving, I’m reflecting on how many ways this city allows me to get my glitter or leather or dance on in the name of altruism. Whether it’s Nasty, my filthy fun-raiser for AIDS Emergency Fund on first Fridays at the Powerhouse (come check it out on December 4!), or Real Bad, the closing party of the Folsom Street Fair that just gave away $150,000 to worthy beneficiaries, I’m continually humbled by how often a night on the town results in tangible support for San Franciscans that truly need our help.

Even my gig as a gogo dancer for Fresh ultimately amounts to shaking my ass for charity. On November 22 I’ll be working the box knowing that my “werk” is going to Maitri, which provides hospice care for people living with AIDS. Meanwhile, Maitri was one of Real Bad’s beneficiaries this year. That’s measurable impact, and all I’m doing is being the circuit sister I can’t help but be!

At Nasty, we play a game called STICK IT IN! that involves big giggles and small change (in Crisco cans) and results in a couple of grants each month for HIV/AIDS emergency assistance. Really? I get to throw myself at the men of the Powerhouse and call myself a fag hag philanthropist? That’s something to be extremely thankful for!

Let’s bring it to our common cause whenever and wherever we can this holiday season. It’s all about the giving, and trusting that, in San Francisco, we’re always getting more than we give.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Bring It! October 30, 2009

I am not a lesbian. Not that there’s anything wrong with being lesbian, but my recent cruiseliner gaycation is making me suddenly feel the need to protest a little.

As one of 16 women on a floating bathhouse packed with 3,100 hot homos, my journey was quite eye-opening. Of course I can see exactly why there would be confusion and curiosity about what the hell I was doing on board.

The fact that I was sharing a cabin with my best girlfriend, dance partner, and circuit sister Joanna only added to the misperception. This despite the very clear signage I posted on our door explaining that we are gay men and San Fransexual drag queens, at least as much as anyone else on the dick deck.

I just couldn’t help but be surprised at how often we were unintentionally treated like circus freaks. Kind-hearted boys repeatedly introduced themselves by offering up that their lesbian sister/friend/neighbor would love us, or by offering to have children with us (ew!). Basically, it was “some of my best friends are lesbians” all over the place.

Totally understandable, and ultimately quite sweet, although it did get me to thinking about how difficult it is to leave behind the bubble of San Francisco (even to go on a big gay boat, which is only just barely a departure from San Francisco). The whole mistaken-lesbian-identity thing made me appreciate yet again how much I love living over the rainbow, where it’s much more rare that anyone puts my box in a box.

In San Francisco, we’re free to be you and me. We’re free to fly our freak flags high and proud, and we’re free to live anywhere and everywhere on the Kinsey Scale, and it doesn’t even have to be the same place day-to-day. Hell, we don’t even have to choose between being male and female in San Francisco, which is where I got off correcting so many seamen by insisting that I was a gay man just like them.

San Francisco has afforded me the privilege of losing all perspective when it comes to what’s gay or straight and where I fit in. The point is that I do fit in, and I’m so grateful to be that kind of freak.

In San Francisco, such ambiguity and fluidity isn’t just tolerated, it’s celebrated. That’s a beautiful thing, even if – sadly - it’s too chilly here for boys to rock Speedos around the clock like they do on the big gay boat.

Here’s where I’ll be getting my San Fransexual freak on coming up…

Friday, November 6:

Nasty: A Filthy Fun-raiser for the AIDS Emergency Fund
Special Night: Get your gothic leather glam on!
Nasty Girl Suzan Revah hosts; Nasty Boys play STICK IT IN!; Special performance by Glam Electro Pop Duo Ejector; with dirty dancing & dirty demos; free massage by Alex of Club EROS
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom, $5

Saturday, November 7:

Bearracuda Underwear Party with DJ Pete Savas and Medic
Bears, cubs, and pups free massages, great tunes, tasty snacks, and friendly guys.
9pm-3am at Deco, 510 Larkin at Turk, $5/$7 after 10pm


The Low Hat Saloon
An evening of dancing, drinks, and a spectacular show set in a mythical San Francisco Gold Rush era saloon, starring some of the world's top pro Latin/ballroom dancers, immediately following the California Dreaming Dancesport Festival.
7:30pm-midnight at The Hotel Whitcomb, 1231 Market Street

Friday, November 13

Mister and Miss Gay Pageant: "Down the Rabbit Hole: A Night of Fairy Tales"
7pm doors/8pm pageant at Hotel Whitcomb, 1231 Market
$15 advance/$20 door, premium tables of 10 $250. Advance tickets at Marlenas, 488 Hayes

Sunday, November 15:

PLAY: Military Furlough T-Dance with DJ Ted Eiel
Flirt. Frolic. Dance. Sir!
Gear: CasualMilitary.Army.Navy.AirForce.Marine.CoastGuard
5pm-midnight at DNA Lounge, 375 11th Street
$20 advance tickets from PLAY-Pals, $25 advance tickets retail and online, $30 door

Immediately followed by…

Thick with DJ Frank Wild
11pm-3am at Club Eight, 1151 Folsom, $10

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Bring It! October 10, 2009

Going on a big gay cruise boat probably doesn’t sound like a vacation from San Francisco. It’s actually more like San Francisco on steroids, or on acid, or on the most perfect trail mix of party drugs.

Which means for this Original Fag Hag and self-proclaimed cruise director, it’s a sun-soaked slice of heaven. Blazing sunshine is really the only thing the “Dick Deck” has that San Francisco doesn’t have when it comes to a perfect gay world. Setting sail on an Atlantis cruise is like living in a biosphere where the only concerns are whether you have enough sunscreen on and what to wear to the next party.

Living in the bubble of San Francisco feels like gaycation a lot of the time. We work really hard to play really hard, but hedonism is really our full-time job. The rest of the gay world looks to us to set the standard!

On the boat, the hedonism is more intensified, and the agenda more compressed. Instead of 3 parties a weekend, it’s 3 parties a day, and instead of the occasional weekend in Speedos on Boy Beach, it’s a nonstop parade of underwear models in banana hammocks. It’s like a weeklong reality-show challenge, in which one’s skills as a homosexual are put to the ultimate test.

Coming home from a gay cruise ain’t pretty, even when you’re coming home to Oz. I’ll be back just in time for Halloween, a holiday that reminds me yet again how special San Francisco is. Costumes are practically our uniforms here over the rainbow, and there’s a pagan ritual going on somewhere every night of the week.

October 23

Queens Are Wild: StopAIDS Project and Elbow Grease invite you to roll the dice
A Halloween casino event and dance party, hosted by Bebe Sweetbriar, plus a special appearance by Kristine W
Casino games, pornstar dealers, and a costume contest from 8pm-midnight; dancing until 3am at Mezzanine, 444 Jesse Street at 5th, tickets start at $25 or 415.575.0150 x260


GhettoDisco: DJ Hawthorne’s Birthday Bash, wth Shawn Perry & Cuervo
11pm-11am, featuring an extended crazy-funky afterhours set beginning at 2am, no cover before midnight
Endup, 6th and Harrison

October 24

Pornstar returns with music by producer/remixer DJ Escape
Featuring Rascal Exclusive Jeremy Bildingmusic; Host Michael Brandon and Gogo studs Damian Rios, Race Cooper, and Darren Summers
With 2 floors and 3 bars of Manly Mayhem, with a Perky Booty contest in the 70s soul/disco lounge
9pm-3am at Club Eight, 1151 Folsom, $15 before midnight/$20 after


Memory/Healing Party: HIV Era Veterans Celebration
Celebrate the everyday heroes who have survived and thrived in the HIV era, with music, dancing, workshops, and the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence
1pm-5pm, War Memorial Veterans' Hall, 401 Van Ness, free

October 25

Church: Celebrating 10 years of Our Love!
Go to church with Bebe Sweetbriar; Free brunch with soul food, old-school gospel, hip hop and R&B spun by DJ Olga T; special guest performances by the Black Men of the Castro Calendar, with dancing and mimosas
1pm-5pm at The Café, 2367 Market Street

October 26

Defying Inequality: A Celebrity Benefit for Marriage Equality at San Francisco Palace of the Fine Arts
Join the cast of Wicked San Francisco, Broadway stars, members of the San Francisco Arts Community, and a variety of celebrity guests for an evening of song and dance in support equal rights.
Entertainment includes Patty Duke, Bruce Vilanch, the Cast of Wicked San Francisco, Matt Alber, Clifford Banagale, Boylesque, Connie Champagne, Carmen Cusack, Ava Garter, Judy Gold, Selene Luna, Meg Mackay, Scott Matthew, Billy Philadelphia, Laughing Pizza, Empress XXX Donna Sachet, and Suzanne Whanghunter, Las Vegas).
7:30-9:30 pm VIP Reception (Show only, $100; Show and VIP Party, $250)

October 31 – Halloween

Colossus: A Celebration of Lost Idols with DJ Manny Lehman
Major dead celebrity costume contest with cash prizes
10pm-4am, high atop the Metreon at the corner of 4th & Mission, $50 advance/$60 door
FOLLOWED BY: reLOAD Afterhours at 525 Howard with DJ Pornstar, $20 door


Halloween: A Party! Presented by Trannyshack & Midnight Mass
Hosted by Heklina as "Dragula" & Peaches Christ as "Tran Helsing"; Featuring Putanesca, Holy McGrail, Lady Bear, and Syphilis Diller, Raya Light, Holotta Tymes, Cookie Dough and More; Co-Starring Jackie Beat, with DJs Pinky Ring & Silencefiction
9pm-3am, midnight show at The Cat Club, 1190 Folsom St. at 8th, $15 cover/$25 out of costume


Big Top: A Homoween Disco Circus
With DJs Kevin Graves (NYC) and Marcus Boogie; a midnight show featuring Oxana Olsen, Miss Rahni and Tess Tickle; Juanita MORE’s annual Halloween costume contest; Booty Call portraits
9pm-3am at Club Ei8ht, 1151 Folsom, $10 door


Social Club: Halloween Fun House with DJs Lee Decker, Luke Fry, Pornstar and Joshua J
Sideshow freaks, spectacular live acts, Ringmaster Hostess Lady Lumpia, Psycho Circus Clowns
9pm at Lookout, 16th and Market in the Castro

November 1

Come see the Original Fag Hag on the gogo box at:
Halloween Fresh with DJ/Producer Tony Moran – his Fresh debut!
Benefiting World Bike, 6pm-midnight at Ruby Skye, 420 Mason Street @ Geary, $20 advance/$25 door

November 6:

Nasty: A Filthy Fun-raiser for the AIDS Emergency Fund
The Black Party: Get your leather goth on!
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom, $5
Nasty Girl Suzan Revah hosts; Nasty Boys play STICK IT IN!; Special performance by Glam Electro Pop Duo Ejector; with dirty dancing & dirty demos; free massage by Alex of Club EROS

Friday, October 2, 2009

Bring It! October 2, 2009

San Francisco has its own way of doing everything, and it’s particularly apparently this time of year, our peak season.

I’m not just talking about our Indian Summer. Much like the Jewish calendar has its own timeline and its own set of holidays, San Francisco’s calendar doesn’t quite synch beyond the bubble.

While the rest of the Western world cues its seasonal stress to Thanksgiving and Christmas, our “high holidays” in Oz are marked by Pride and Folsom, with the Castro Street Fair feeling something like New Year’s Eve. Much like Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, our major holidays give us the chance to celebrate another year of glitter while atoning for our “sins.” (I don’t know about you, but I’m still licking my wounds from Folsom!)

While “normal” people are storing away their beach blankets and going through crates of Christmas ornaments, San Franciscans are wondering if their rainbow flags are in good enough condition to fly proud through the rainy season. We’re planning our gaycation budgets, and we’re repairing our leathers so they’ll be in good condition for the next “formal” event.

I never cared much for Easter before I moved to San Francisco, but it’s now among my favorite holidays. It’s perfectly irreverent, and a perfect tribute to the birth of spring. Our rites and rituals take paganism to a whole new level, and the significance of gathering San Framily to “observe” holidays like The White Party or even Fleet Week - gotta have an excuse for sailor suits! - is no less real than any church meeting.

Our need for fundraisers, support groups, and booster clubs is no less real, either. I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted from the fabulous blur of parties and parades by this time of the year, and Halloween is just around the corner!

Monday, August 31, 2009

Bring It! August 31, 2009

I’m a Pollyanna of the gay dance circuit. In my eyes, all is glittery and love under the disco ball, a community coming together to move their bodies and spirits.

Which is why it warms my gay heart when the community also comes together behind the scenes, with party producers/promoters joining forces to deliver a disco double-whammy.

Take Sundance, the Russian River circuit revival brought to us by Gus Presents, along with some help from DJ Luke Johnstone’s Dig-It-Talent. After a 5-year hiatus, the event made a hugely successful comeback, bringing the boys together for an unforgettable day of dancing in the sunshine.

From my perspective on the dancefloor – which is somewhere in between work and play, somewhere between promoter and party girl - collaboration and cooperation produce better results than competition.

Take Black XXXmas, another event Gus and Luke come together to produce each year. It’s unique and huge, and we look forward to it each year. Can we get some more of that, please?

I know it sounds idealistic (Pollyanna), but my take is that our nightlife scene is really working when we’ve got the best of our producers and promoters working together.

With all the fun parties/scenes in San Francisco, it’s hard enough out here for a promoter. Party people are moody and fussy. We’re skeptical of new events, even though our favorite complaint is that that there aren’t enough of them. We always want more but we don’t want to pay more, and we have short memories when the essentially thankless job of producing goes well.

That just means we’re no different than any other city, but I like to think of San Francisco as a city that transcends.

Like at this year’s Pride, when the Wunderland team threw its support to the boys behind The Disco. The party surpassed expectations and was the hit of the weekend. Gay Day Great America brings together Fresh’s Janine Shiota and DJ Luke Johnstone, and the result is an event that consistently overflows with talent.

The power to have more partnerships and less drama lies within us. We vote by showing up, and we can easily encourage our nightlife scene to be less war-torn and more like a gay United Nations.

The Folsom Street Fair couldn’t be what it is today without promoters and producers rallying together. It’s now a worldwide model of what can happen when a simple party transcends, having grown up into not just a San Francisco icon, but a massive fundraiser as well.

Why wouldn’t we want more parties backed by more people who know how to give us the goods? If my gays have taught me nothing, it’s that more is more and less is a bore, so to all the promoters who are willing to tag-team to give us more, I say “Bring it!”

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Bring It! August 18, 2009

Life is precious, and short, and there’s no better city than San Francisco to seize the gay day and live to your loudest and proudest.

Some might call it hedonism, but I would say it’s just making the most of our time. We squeeze every last drop out of this life while we can, because when you’re living over the rainbow, that’s just how we roll.

Sure, devotion to pleasure as a way of life can have some pitfalls (sleep deprivation and spending beyond one’s means come to mind), but living the dream is what our nightlife scene is all about. Whatever faggotry you fancy, we’ve got it. San Francisco is the ultimate enabler.

For a small town, our parties are impressively larger than life. Big holiday weekends always remind me that we take the concept of lifestyle to the extreme here in our beautiful little bubble by the bay, and I personally wouldn’t want it any other way.

Here’s where I’ll be bringing it while the bringin’s good…

Friday, August 28

Trannyshack Bjork Night
The annual salute to the Ice Princess
Featuring a midnight show with peformances by Heklina, Putanesca, Peggy L'eggs, Glamamore, Kiddie, Fauxnique, Raya Light, Syphilis Diller, Ambrosia Salad, Vivianne Forevermore, Elijah Minnelli, and many more.
10pm-3am at DNA Lounge, 375 11th Street, $12


DJ Jamie J Sanchez at Trigger, 2344 Market Street,

Saturday, August 29

The Return of Big Top, A Homo Disco Circus
A party for fags, dykes, and tranimals
With DJ Juanita More and DJ Goldblooded, plus a drag show dedicated to Michael Jackson featuring performances by Charisma Glitteratti, Ambrosia Salad, Hoku Mama Swamp, and from Ru Paul's Drag Race, Miss Tammie Brown.
9pm-3am at Club Ei8ht, 1151 Folsom between 8th and 9th, free before 10pm, $5 after

Sunday, August 30

Mr. and Miss Golden Gate Gaymes and Picnic
BBQ, buffet, beer and beverage bust presented by the Imperial Council of San Francisco
Noon – 5pm at the Eureka Valley Rec Center Main Field, at 18th and Collingwood in the Castro, $20
Streetcar procession immediately following to the Golden Gate finale at Triple Crown, 6pm-9pm

Saturday, September 5

SF Leather Daddy boy XXVII Contest
Benefiting the AIDS Emergency Fund
9pm-midnight at The Eagle Tavern, 398 12th at Harrison


Wunderland with DJs Eddie Elias and Hawthorne
10pm-6am at Mezzanine, 444 Jesse Street @ Mint, $15 before midnight, $25 after


Underworld with DJ Kevin Lee
Drop your pants and dance!
10pm-6am at 550 Barneveld, $20

Sunday, September 6

Fresh with DJ Manny Lehman
Benefiting AIDS Project LA
6pm-midnight at Ruby Skye, 420 Mason Street at Geary, $20 advance/$25 door


Sanctuary with DJs John LePage and Alexander
Men. Music. Muscle.
10pm-6am at 1015 Folsom, $20 advance/$30 door

Friday, September 11

Nasty: A filthy fun-raiser for the AIDS Emergency Fund
With Suzan Revah as your Nasty Girl host, and Nasty Boys playing STICK IT IN!
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom between 9th and 10th

Friday, August 7, 2009

Bring It! August 7, 2009

I don’t care nearly as much about Britney Spears as I do about, say, Bebe Sweetbriar, and these days I spend more time looking through photos on Facebook than I do looking through the pages of Us Weekly.

I attribute this behavior to a phenomenon known as “sublebrity” (some call it “localebrity”), and it’s yet another reason why I love living in San Francisco. We have our own unique vibe in all that we do, and our local talent is rich and revolutionary. All the entertainment and amusement I could possibly need resides right here in our beautiful bubble by the bay.

I love to hate Facebook, but I also hate to love it. More and more, it seems like “social networking” is everyone’s favorite version of reality TV. As citizens of the action-packed Castro, it’s easy to feel better about ourselves when we compare to our “peers,” especially those bored and boring souls from our former lives who aren’t privileged enough to live here. (Bless their hearts.)

We feel validated, and our sublebrity status is confirmed, when our hundreds of “friends” and “fans” recognize, appreciate, and support our colorful, quirky little lives on the glittery stage of the San Francisco scene. Keeping this in mind motivates me to go out even more, and to bring it even harder.

Here’s where me and my sublebrity pals will be acting up next, creating the next episode in the days of our fabulous lives. Come on out and make for some good Fagbook TV with me!

Friday, August 14

Lick It: What Do You Have a Taste For?
Benefiting the Breast Cancer Emergency Fund and the Positive Resource Center. Come get satiated at this event hosted by Lance Holman. Featuring lickable gogo dancers, decadent raffles, and Ms. V at the bootblack stand.
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom Street (between 9th & 10th)


SF Grand Ball: An Old-School Vogue Ball Competition
Part of Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory’s residency at the Yerba Buena Center for the Arts Push Play Festival
The House of Glitter challenges all of the Bay Area's Houses of Queens, Kings, Butches and every Queerity in between to compete, every Friday in August, leading up to the Battle at Ground Zero Championship on September 11 and a $200 prize for Best in Show. Tommy LaBeija from NYC's Legendary House of LaBeija oversees the judging, so get your house in order!
8pm at Yerba Buena Center for the Arts, 701 Mission Street

Saturday, August 15

Industry San Francisco DJ Showcase with DJs James Torres, Russ Rich, Frank Wild and Jamie J Sanchez
Plus, performances by Suzan Revah Original Fag Hag and the Pussy Posse, including Steven Satyricon and Joanna Parks on the gogo box!
10pm-5am at Mighty, 119 Utah Street at 15th, $15 advance/$25 door


The 14th Annual Drag King Contest
The biggest drag king competition in the world, benefiting P.A.W.S. (Pets Are Wonderful Support)
8pm to 2:30am at DNA Lounge, 375 11th Street, $15 in advance/$20 door (general admission); $25 VIP, $35 limited balcony seating


Bearracuda 3-year Anniversary
With DJs Tony Ruiz, BoyShapedBox, and Medic, plus a 10:30pm show with Fruitbomb, Hoku Mama Swamp, Glitterella, and Glamamore
Hot and cold snacks in the pool room, heavy petting all over
9pm-3am at Deco at 510 Larkin @ Turk, $8

Sunday, August 16

Flagging in the Park with DJ Luke Johnstone
Benefiting Larkin Street Youth Services
Enjoy sun, music, flagging, friends, and fauna at this event, a tradition that started in 1996 as a celebration of life. Open to all of the flow arts - fan dancing, flag dancing, poi - and their supporters.
1pm-4pm in the AIDS Memorial Grove, Golden Gate Park


Fresh with the Perry Twins
Benefiting AIDS Walk
6pm-midnight at Ruby Skye, 420 Mason Street at Geary
$20 advance or before 6pm, $25 after


Thick with DJ Luke Johnstone
11pm-3am at Club Ei8ht, 1151 Folsom Street between 7th and 8th, $10

Friday, August 21

Meat Packin’ Contest, Benefiting Under One Roof and the AIDS Emergency Fund

Your chance to show your pride for what you're packing! Don your favorite jock, boxer, or brief to show what you've got, then battle with your bulge for a $100 cash prize. (Contestants need to arrive by 10:30pm.)
Sponsored by Colt Studios, and featuring Suzan Revah the Original Fag Hag on the judging panel (lucky me!).
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom, $5

All weekend long: August 21-23

Sundance: Russian River Party Weekend
All-day outdoor dancing in the sun under the mighty redwood trees of western Sonoma County. Like one big, gay summer camp!
Daylight Pool Party with DJs Lee Decker and Jason G, 11am-6pm at the Russian River Resort; followed by Moondance Men on the Moon with DJ Matt Consola, 9pm-6am at River Space
Sundance Russian River Morning Party with DJ Phil B, Noon-6pm at a private Guerneville Estate; followed by Sunset Massive Tribal Closing Dance with DJ Luke Johnstone, 6pm-3am at River Space, featuring a special performance by Suzan Revah, the Original Fag Hag, and Travis Creston, Mr. SF Leather 2007.


Saturday, August 22

Shangri-La August Moon Festival Party with DJs Dan De Leon, Kevin Lee, and Alan Bentley
10pm-6am at The Endup, 6th and Harrison Streets
Free before 11pm, $15 until 2am, $20 after

Sunday, August 23

Endup T-Dance with DJ Frank Wild
Sunday “church” begins at 6am, Frank Wild spins at noon. Resident DJs keep the beats going until 8pm.
The Endup, 6th and Harrison Streets

Tuesday, August 25

Chaser & Electronic Music Bears Present… The Miss Grrrrrrl Pageant
A night devoted to our plump and furry friends and their lovers.
9pm-late, show at 11pm at The Endup, 401 6th Street at Harrison, $10

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Bring It! July 25, 2009

The yellow brick road that leads to San Francisco leads the way for so many a gay.

The fact that our city gave birth to the concept of bears is yet another reason to be so proud that we live here, as it illustrates and celebrates the diversity of our standard-setting gay community.

Lazy Bear weekend is a lovely chance to reflect on how the freedom we enjoy here allows us to evolve past a community of mere Castro clones. Here in the land over the rainbow, we have a gay for every taste, and a flag for every fag.

The bears are a grrrr-eat example of how our beautiful little bubble by the bay allows everyone to create their own reality - not only to survive, but to thrive.

Bear identity was born in San Francisco in the 80s, in defiance of the smooth ideal of the stereotypical muscle queen. A welcome aesthetic alternative to the swishy twink, our furry, burly bears stand for acceptance. They have been wildly successful in promoting an alternative identity for gay men who just can’t see themselves in the clichés (the Generibears backlash notwithstanding).

These days the bears are a subculture of their own, with their own code, their own titles, and their own circuit. Even aside from the International Bear Rendezvous and Lazy Bear, their neck of the woods is a year-round party.

As a proud Goldilocks with big love for all my bears, from cute little cubs to otters and wolves, it’s great to know that you can skip the gym, pack a picnic, and take a walk on the wild side anytime. Whether it’s Bearracuda, Movie Bears, Bearapalooza or Bearlesque that makes you go WOOF, our bears bring the realness, to the Russian River and beyond.

July 29-August 3

Lazy Bear Weekend in Guerneville
Thousands of men from around the world gather every summer in the forest town of Guerneville for a week of dancing, drinking beer and just being with men.

Saturday, August 1

Bearracuda: Mid-summer underwear party
A party for bears, cubs and other wildlife, with free massages, great tunes, tasty snacks, and friendly guys
9pm at Deco, 510 Larkin @ Turk

Friday, August 7

Nasty: A filthy fun-raiser for the AIDS Emergency Fund
With Suzan Revah as your Nasty Girl host, and Nasty Boys playing “Stick it in!”
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom Street

Friday, August 8

Dancing with the Drag Stars
Who will be crowned champion in the final round? Featuring the Original Fag Hag competing against four of her fiercest drag sisters, with celebrity judges and guest performances.
7pm at Cheryl Burke Dance Grand Ballroom, 1830 17th Street

Wunderland with DJs Hawthorne and Kio Kio
The official Dancing with the Drag Stars afterparty
10pm at Glas Kat 520 4th @ Bryant

Tuesday, August 11

Chaser: The Black Issue, A Tribute to the African-American Drag Diva
Featuring performances by Mercedez Munro, Erykah Daye Munro, Miss Rahni
Carrie BlackShaw, and Honey Mahogany
9pm at The Endup, 401 6th Street @ Harrison

Friday, July 10, 2009

Bring It! July 10, 2009

There’s nothing a gay boy loves more than an only-in-San-Francisco event, and Up Your Alley is, well, right up my alley.

Leather, fetish, and BDSM have come a long way since this hard-core street festival began in 1985. Kink is hardly unique or hardly subversive anymore, but that doesn’t make it any less essential to the distinct and distinguished character of our beloved bay of pigs.

There may never be a time again when I’ll be one of just a handful of females daring to do Dore. That’s bittersweet, personally, for an old-school fag hag like me, but it’s also undeniable progress politically. There’s no longer actual risk associated with strutting SOMA in your chaps and nipple clamps, because sexual freedom is no longer a privilege, it’s our right. That’s a real reason to celebrate.

No matter what color hanky you flag, and no matter if your gear is actually just drag, set aside a day devoted to dancing, demos, and debauchery. Depravity is as much a source of pride for our community as anything with a rainbow on it, so rock out with your cock out!

That’s what I’ll be doing at all the Up Your Alley events, and I hope you’ll come play with me. I expect to see your ass, too, or I’ll paddle it until you beg for mercy. Out of respect for Dore, I’ll even leave the glitter at home!

Friday, July 17:

Happy Hour with DJ Christopher B
5:30-8:30pm at Lookout, 2600 16th Street @ Market


MANnequin Fridays
Tragically gorgeous flowers, legendary Diptyque smell, and the sound waves of Amasha & Mc Clure
BOC, 198 Church Street
$2, 2-for-1 Ketel One drinks until 12am


SMACK! Hosted by Juanita MORE! and Nathan Rapport of Detroit’s SASS
Featuring Detroit ex-pat Jason Kendig and Detroit tastemaker Chuck Hampton delivering a very potent shot of Detroit-style dance fun.
10pm-2am at Underground SF, 424 Haight Street, $5


The Endup, 6th & Harrison Streets
11pm-11am, always free before midnight

Saturday, July 18:

Michael Jackson Night at Club Gossip
Authentic 80s music and video in two rooms hosted by Randy Maupin, with a heavy dose of Michael Jackson between 11pm and midnight
9:30-3am at The Cat Club, 1190 Folsom Street, free before 10pm, $8 after

Sunday, July 19:

I’ll be celebrating my birthday on the gogo box at Fresh, my favorite T-dance. There’s an open invitation to spank me, which makes it the perfect warm-up for Dore!

Fresh with DJ Dan DeLeon
Benefiting the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society
6pm-midnight at Ruby Skye, 420 Mason Street at Geary, $20 advance or before 6:30pm, $25 after

Tuesday, July 21:

Posh Tuesdays with Donna Sachet
5pm-7pm at Infusion Lounge, 124 Ellis Street


Bulb: Blockbuster, a Hagztravaghanza hosted by Precious Moments
An interdisciplinary spectacular of electrifying vocalists, titilating trannies, and burlesque. Dance your inspired ass off to classic NYC House beats, featuring the Original Fag Hag and her girl Joanna with bombastic gogo artistry.
11pm-3am at The Stud, 9th and Harrison Streets, $8

Friday, July 24:

Not an official Up Your Alley event, but the Cockettes are officially part of San Francisco’s sexual revolution, and this play celebrates their 40th anniversary, so come pay tribute (through August 16)…

Pearls over Shanghai – Starring Steven Satyricon and Precious Moments!
A comic mock-operetta about white slavery and miscegenation set in the colorful world of 1937 Shanghai.
The Hypnodrome, 575 10th Street

Saturday, July 25:

Twisted Nastier - Up Your Alley Eve
Filthy dirty gogo dancers (including myself, the Nasty Girl!) and heavy cruising.
10pm-1am at The Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom Street between 9th and 10th


Bay of Pigs with DJ Ted Eiel & DJ Luis Cintron (in the dungeon)
Sexy dancers, demos, and play spaces galore.
10pm-4am at 181 Eddy Street, $40 advance/$50 door

Sunday, July 26:

Up Your Alley
The Folsom Street fair that’s not for tourists or gawkers.
11am-6pm on Dore Alley between Folsom and Howard Streets, and in the adjoining blocks of Folsom between 9th and Juniper Streets. $7 suggested donation


PLAY T-Dance with DJ Rob Kaftan
Flirt, Frolic, and Dance at the Up Your Alley T-Dance and Closing Party
5pm-midnight at DNA Lounge, 375 11th Street
$20 tickets available from a PLAY Pal (like me!), or $25 advance/$30 door

Friday, June 12, 2009

Bring It! June 12, 2009

It’s so easy to take so much for granted in San Francisco, the land over the rainbow and the gay pride capital of the universe.

Here in Oz, we’re lucky enough to believe that all men, women, and everyone in between are created equal. We see living proof every minute of every day, but the truth is that the fight continues, and it’s worth remembering that the celebrations we live and love today grew out of strife, struggle, and salvation.

The divas who keep our dancefloors and Pride parades humping, thumping, and pumping are testifying to all those same themes today. With Prop 8 still the ruling law of the land, those themes are just as relevant now as they were when the drag queens of Stonewall took to the streets and took their lives in their hands, kicking off a civil rights movement back before queer was cute.

Generations have grown up since then, and the movement has aroused, involved, and evolved so successfully that we no longer feel compelled to riot in the streets. As much pride as we’ve gained, it’s a damn shame that the indignity of inequality is still our reality.

Rallying to the cause and rallying to the dancefloor strengthens our sense of community and purpose. Raising our collective consciousness while raising the roof is what the gays do better than anyone else!

No matter where you fit in on the LGBTQ spectrum, our city offers no shortage of ways to put a little protest in your party, and that’s something we can all take pride in.

Friday, June 19:

Snap-a-licious: Ginger Snap’s Monthly Drag Show
Featuring performances by Ginger Snap, Holy DeVille, Pinky Maraschino, Miss Nix, and as always, Melody Grooves
10pm show, followed by dancing with DJ Lambchop until 2am
9pm-2am at Deco Lounge, 510 Larkin Street at Turk

Saturday, June 20:

The Launch Party
With Kaskade, Chris Lake, Chris Willis, Jess, Bellatrax, Cataracts, Jamie J Sanchez, and Wayne G, plus Energy 92.7 DJs
8pm-3am at The Regency Center, 1290 Sutter Street, $35
Tickets available at and Gold’s Castro or SOMA
$1 from every ticket goes the San Francisco AIDS Foundation

Sunday, June 21:

Marlena’s Dragathon
Kings, Queens and Everything In Between
Over 50 different performers (The Original Fag Hag included) contribute to a 9-hour dragathon to raise funds for the charity designees of the Castro Lions Charities. Everyone is welcome to perform at this event, the perfect place to try drag for the first time if you’ve always wanted to. The audience couldn’t be more appreciative!
12pm-9pm at Marlena’s, 488 Hayes Street

Friday, June 26:

Underworld with DJs Lee Decker and Kevin Lee
1,000 boys in briefs, so drop your pants and dance!
10pm-late at Space 550, 550 Barneveld at Industrial, $20 advance/$30 door, clothes check included


Club Asia returns with DJs Luke Fry, Robbie Martin, and Zax
The largest and most ground-breaking Gay Asian club on the west coast for over 6 years returns, for one night only.
With sexy dancing by the Club Asia Body Boys and the world-famous transgender Ladies of AsiaSF
10pm – afterhours at DNA Lounge, 375 11th Street @ Folsom


MR. with DJs Kidd Sysko and David Harness
Pride's annual mustached dance party
9pm-3am at Triple Crown (formerly Octavia Lounge), 1760 Market Street
Bearracuda presents Underwear Night with DJs Airick, Boyshapedbox, 50 Pound Note, and Medic
A party for bears, cubs, and other wildlife, with free massages, great tunes, tasty snacks and friendly guys
9pm-3am at Deco Lounge, 510 Larkin Street, $7/$5 before 10pm


SupperVision Pride: A Fusion of Film & Performance
Pre-show in the Pajama Lounge, Multimedia main stage and underwater fashion show at midnight
Featuring Ginger Snap, Artist Malcolm Drake, Ambrosia Salad, acrobatics by Condi Davis, and Violin Bliss by Paul Scribble Festa
With DJs Tekkk and Malakai in the main room, and DJ Pup in the lounge
$15 limited pre-sale, $20 in costume or PJs, $25 no costume before 1am
Partial proceeds to benefit the Comfort & Joy Scholarship Fund
10pm-5am at SupperClub, 657 Harrison Street at 3rd


Marga and The Boys
Barely legal comedy starring Marga Gomez, Marty Grimes, David Hawkins, and Nate Blanchard; Marga’s third engagement at The National Queer Arts Festival in her dual role as uproarious dyke diva and procurer of sensational gay male comics.
8pm at the LGBT Center, Rainbow Room, 1800 Market Street, $15

Saturday, June 27:

Start your Pink Saturday right with…

The 11th Annual Pride Brunch for Positive Resource Center
Join Gary Virginia and Donna Sachet in honoring the Pride Parade’s Grand Marshals
11am-2pm it the Hotel Whitcomb Ballroom, 1231 Market Street @ 8th Street
VIP $100/General admission $75

And then check out the street party that goes from Dolores Park to the Castro all day and into the night. Then gear up for…

The Disco with DJs Paul Goodyear and Bud Chism
Gay fun done just right!
Featuring the Original Fag Hag as Snow White with the Seven Bears and Evil Cherry Queen Snatch, plus The Twister Boys, the It’s a Drag Lounge with Charisma Glitterati and Bebe Sweetbriar, and The Juice Box Flagger Stage
10pm at Mezzanine, 444 Jessie St., $40 retail and online, $30 through Disco hosts, $50 door


Colossus with DJs Manny Lehman and Tony Moran
Colossus returns to its original home at 1015 Folsom for the club’s first all-gay Saturday night in 17 years
Plus DJs Jim Hopkins (in the Retro Room), Kidd Sysko (in the Crib Room), and Pornstar (in the Electro Room)
Live on stage: Flava channels Sylvester
10pm-6am at 1015 Folsom, $50 advance/$70 door

Sunday June 28:

The Original Fag Hag’s Pride wouldn’t be complete without this delicious double-whammy:

Fresh with DJ Kimberly S
With a special performance by Jai Rodriguez, and benefiting San Francisco Pride
6pm-midnight at Ruby Skye, 420 Mason Street, $20 advance/$25 door


Sanctuary with DJs Phil B and Twisted Dee
Men, Music, Muscle, Pride!
10pm-late at 1015 Folsom Street

and there’s also…

Juanita MORE’s Gay Pride Pool Party
Benefiting The Transgender Law Center
Featuring The Ones, James Glass, Robot Hustle (Honey Soundsystem), Victor Rodriguez (Shits & Giggles, LA), Glamamore, Derrick Love, Nicky B, Le Dinosaur & That Mold Science of Gemini Disco, and The Cougar Cadet Corps Drumline
3pm-2am outdoors and indoors at Bambudda Lounge, 601 Eddy Street @ Larkin, $25 advance/$35 door


The Gayest Party of the Year: Trannyshack vs. Big Top!
Big Top front room hosted by Joshua J & Sister Roma, featuring DJ Victor Rodriguez
Midnight drag show in the Trannyshack back room, featuring Heklina, JJ Crackers, Falsetta Knockers, Kiddie, Putanesca, Fauxnique, Metal Patricia, Renttecca, and House of Salad; with DJs Kidd Sysko and Lisa Pittman
9pm-3am at The Cat Club, 1190 Folsom at 8th, $15 pre-sale/$20 door


Unity Pride T-Dance with DJs David Knapp and Jamie J Sanchez
6pm-midnight at DNA Lounge, 375 Eleventh Street, $15 advance


San Francisco's most homolicious dance party for lezzies, queers, lovers and friends
With DJs Nuxx, Zax, Ms. Jackson, and DJ C-L.A.
9pm-3am at Supperclub, 657 Harrison Street at 3rd, $15 presale

Through June 26:

The Golden Girls: The Gay Episodes
Starring Heklina, Pollo Del Mar, Matthew Martin, Cookie Dough, Mike Finn, and Laurie Bushman
June 11 through the 26: Thursdays & Fridays 7pm & 9pm; Saturdays 5pm, 7pm, & 9pm; and Sundays 3pm & 5pm.
Special benefit shows on Wednesday June 17 at 7pm (Rocket Dog Rescue) & 9pm (Western Roundup)
Mama Calizo's Voice Factory, 1519 Mission St. @ 11th
For tickets, go to

And for alternatives to clubbing:

Bay Area Pride Events
A one one-stop-shop listing of activities for those who like to keep active with bike-riding, roller-skating, hiking, bowling, running, walking, game nights, and square dancing

Hopefully your Pride also includes the freedom to call in sick to work on the Monday after (once we get marriage equality passed we can start rallying to make Pride a national holiday with a paid recovery day to follow), and then it’ll be an awfully short week before you come to the realization that the Pride never ends in San Francisco.

By Friday, July 3, it’ll be time once again to have a great time while helping our common cause and community, at:

A filthy fun-raiser for the AIDS Emergency Fund
Hosted by Nasty Girl Suzan Revah on first Fridays at the Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom

Come by and we’ll toast the frisky, flagrant freedom we are so perversely privileged to enjoy every day here in Oz!

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Bring It! May 16, 2009

It was hardly a cold, dark winter for our city’s nightlife, and spring came with new parties blossoming everywhere. There’s too much of a good thing happening already, and San Francisco summer is arriving with a serious lineup of happening good times. Are you ready?

Gay Day Great America on May 22 is a sweet kickoff to the season, with rollercoaster rides and great shows, including the Trannyshack stage (the Original Fag Hag performs twice, with Heklina and Charisma Glitterati), and shows by Erasure’s Andy Bell, drag Tupperware Lady Dixie Longate, and the always fierce Flava. Dance into the night with the adorable dancing DJ duo The Perry Twins.

Saturday May 23 brings dance parties for every persuasion, from furry grrry action at Bearracuda Basement with DJ Matt Consola at Wunderland, to drop-your-pants-and-dance grooves at Underworld at Space 550 with DJ Kevin Lee, to Asian-inspiration Shangri-La at the Endup with DJ Pegasus.

Sunday May 24 rounds out the holiday weekend celebration, with Trannyshack’s Madonna Tribute Night at Cat Club, bright and bubbly T-dance tunes from DJ Wayne G at Fresh, and extra-manly woofiness for Sanctuary afterhours with DJs David Knapp and Luke Johnstone at 1015 Folsom.

The best thing about our thriving city scene as summer gets underway is that you don’t have to wait until holiday weekends for big and hard entertainment anymore. Your short week back at work after the holiday will barely be enough time to rest before Unity takes over 1015 Folsom on May 30 for DJs Tracy Young and Luke Johnstone. By Sunday May 31 you’ll be ready for some chilled-out, down-home, old-fashioned fun (for a great cause!) at the AEF County Fair in Golden Gate Park. Please stop by my kissing booth for a smooch!

Squeezing it all in will surely take it all out of you, but it’ll be deeply satisfying, and ain’t that why they call it the summer of love in San Francisco, the town we love so much we’d rather vacation right here than anywhere?

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

DJ Abel Spins the Fun and Keeps the Flame

Miami-based DJ Abel is a circuit superstar. Period.

On gay dancefloors around the world, he is known by his first name. Like Madonna, or Cher.

He spins regularly in San Francisco, often with his longtime pal and fellow DJ superstar, Ralphi Rosario. Together they are known as Rosabel, and both are celebrating 30-year anniversaries behind the decks this year.

Abel has a special place in his heart for San Francisco, having spun at Universe back in the circuit heyday. “Doing Universe was like going to heaven!” he says. “The way the crowd received me every time I was there was so warm, it was beautiful.”

These days his universe centers around Alegria in New York City, a world-class party where he creates his very own “Universo Alegria” with marathon sessions that consistently bring down the house.

His remix and compilation hits are too numerous to mention, as are the circuit parties around the world where he has made his mark. He continues to make fans everywhere he goes, and he makes them completely rabid for his explosive blend of heavy tribal beats, diva anthems, retooled classics, and afterhours darkness.

Coming up, Abel will spend Memorial Day in Los Angeles spinning what’s likely to be a 12-hour set, before gearing up to play Gay Disney and New York Pride. Once summer is in full swing, he’ll be spinning Pride parties in Brazil, Amsterdam, and Barcelona. He’ll also be at sea on a couple of Atlantis cruises, including the Baltic and the Mediterranean.

This Saturday night he returns to San Francisco to spin at Industry at Mighty, where he’ll share billing with a friend from back in his Universe days, San Francisco’s own DJ Jamie J Sanchez. Abel speaks highly of San Francisco’s taste in music, crediting the city with a wealth of musical talent and leadership.

“I get homesick when I travel, but I feel great about going to San Francisco every time, because I know what I’m getting into when I play in San Francisco,” he says. “The crowd in San Francisco is more about the music than the venue or anything else, and I know I’m ready for that. They better be, too!”

What’s the biggest influence on the kind of set you end up spinning?

The mood of the crowd is one thing I focus on a lot. A lot of people say “We got West Coast Abel,” or “We got East Coast Abel,” but really it depends on the event more than the location. The venue has a lot to do with it as well, and the sound system has a lot to do with the impact I can make on the crowd.

How would you describe your evolution over 30 years as a DJ?

It’s been the most wonderful journey! Watching the music change throughout the years is totally incredible, and at the same time, I haven’t lost too much of what I learned along the way.

When I first started, mixing was very, very difficult, because everything was on vinyl. Mixing two records was a challenge, not like today, when everything’s computerized and you can beatmatch everything perfectly.

The skills that we learned back in that time, a lot of the old-timers can relate to. People like Ralphi Rosario, Frankie Knuckles, and then Warren Gluck and Susan Morabito. You had to have total control of your fingers and your ears to make it happen.

For me, the music itself is not as good as it used to be, and that’s been a challenge, but it’s been beautiful because I still have a little something from back then that I bring to what I’m spinning now. It’s fun to play with those elements today and teach a new generation with those things.

What would you like to teach the new generation of dance music lovers?

The new generation would never think that we were playing music before they were born, or since they were kids, but I’m not ashamed of my age or anything like that.

It’s very important that we teach the new generation what we’ve been through, and what it was like before circuit parties were so polished and pretty like they are now. They might say, “Oh, girl! You’re dating yourself!” but I say no, I should be an inspiration. I’m proud to still be part of this scene 30 years later.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever seen from the DJ booth?

It’s embarrassing sometimes, but I can remember a few moments I never expected.
I have a group of fans that follow me from New York to Miami, and on my last Atlantis cruise, they got together wearing these New York City subway t-shirts that spelled my name out on the dancefloor. Subway lines A-B-E-L. That was really cute.

But maybe the craziest thing happened back in 1996, when I was playing at one of the biggest clubs in Miami called Icon. It was a packed Friday night, probably 2,000 people in there, and all of a sudden I see these guys getting on top of the speakers and on top of the bars all over the club. They had ski masks and rifles, and I was thinking “I didn’t know about this show…”

I was laughing, wondering what kind of show was about to happen, and people were yelling at me to shut the music off immediately. Then the lights started coming on and I realized it wasn’t a show, it was a raid! At that time, Prince was the owner of the club, and it was a major raid. They were shutting him down, and it was a shocking moment.

You’ve played all over the world, at just about every major Pride event. Are there any gigs you’re still chasing?

I really have played in every city where a gay man lives. I am lucky enough to say I think I’ve done everything except Sydney Mardi Gras, but that’s coming next year.

Do you think you’re typecast as a DJ?

I’ve read reviews where people say things like “Alegria will always be Alegria, and you always know what you’re gonna get.” To some that may mean I’m tired, but most people like consistency, and consistency has always been successful.

Every legendary club that has been around for decades has had a single DJ or 2 DJs, and people get used to that sound. Where there’s consistency, there’s a consistent crowd. Some new promoters don’t get that, but I’m a firm believer in the idea of a resident DJ. Consistency is why people follow DJs.

I am typecast a little bit. Like when I played at The Pines on Fire Island, that was a big shock for a lot of people, and a lot of people said they had never heard that side of me before.

Fire Island is an extremely picky place to play music. They have a particular sound, which was developed with all the house parties and the beach parties, so when you do a party like Pines, the crowd expects to hear those particular classics, and they’re really serious about it. If you don’t know what classics to play and play them, you’re in trouble!

I had everyone in shock with my selection, and it’s a feeling that I will never forget. In my 30-year history, that was probably the hardest I’ve worked to put a party together. I’ve never done something so intense and so rewarding.

I always said I’d never be able to play Fire Island, but they kept inviting me, and I kept saying “I can’t.” Until the mayor called me himself to ask me to do that party! I ended up being the first DJ in Fire Island history to do the whole party by himself, and to come back a second year and do an encore.

I live for this one acapella track you play all the time, something about “so fuck you”?

(laughs) That’s my signature. I love it!

I love her rudeness, her, pardon the expression, her cuntiness. “You said you’d buy me a big black escalade… You said you’d take me on a trip around the world, but you didn’t, so fuck you!”

It’s an old track, and the actual song itself doesn’t sound that good, but that’s a classic for me. The Alegria classics are the ones that I bring out at special moments. Songs like “La Puta, which is my voice and Ralphi Rosario’s. It’s actually mine and Ralphi’s cat fight over the phone!

“Kiss My Ass!” is another one, as is “Free My Ass.” (laughs again) People sometimes forget to have fun in the clubs, and sometimes you need to remind them, and that’s why I do that. It’s a release, to make people laugh and giggle.

Only me and Ralphi and a few others do that, and to me that’s 30 years of experience.